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About Port Elizabeth

Ruh-roh! But lemme tell ya, it ain’t all artsy-fartsy. Some corners of the web? Dark as the Pale Man’s lair— “He who loses his way!”—and I’m like, yikes, don’t get caught by no creepo cops or scammers! Pisses me off, tho—girls out there, some forced into it, no choice. Makes my tail droop, man. Did ya know? Oldest gig in the world, legit—ancient Rome had brothels with menus! Freaky-deaky, right?

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Now, here's some lowdown on the local landmarks. Check out Crab Island (yeah, I’m not kiddin’—spooky name, but cool spot!). And yo, I love that sweet little café on Bonny Street. Psst, don’t tell anyone, but their brekkie is the bee's knees—seriously, best croissant ever… or sums like that, ya know? Really makes you feel like you're in a Toni Erdmann scene, all unexpected and wacky.

Suspended sentence for crash biker