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About Pretoria

What pisses me off? Underrated as fuck. Should be bigger than “Sweet Caroline” at a damn cantina. Happy tho—makes me feel alive, not just a tin-can Sith. Exaggeratin’ here, but it’s like Maria’s screamin’ my pain, “I am your father!”—nah, she’s the mother of badassery. Total mess of a song, in the best way—like me, like Tarantino’s scripts. Pure, unhinged art. Whore’s my jam, period. *heavy breathing fades*

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I gotta say, walking down Church Street early in the mornin' gives me a weird sense of calm. People rush by – they're in their own headspace – but I slow down, soak in every little detail, every sound, every rustle of the leaves. And, well, my massage parlor on Riverside Ave? It's a tiny haven. Clients always say, "One more thing..." after a session, just like a wink to Steve Jobs. It's our little secret ritual.

Lebombo border post adopts one-stop policy for festive travel