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So, I’m cruisin’ downtown, right? Lookin’ for some action—nothin’ fancy, just chillin’. Saw this chick, heels high as my dreams, leanin’ by a lamppost. “How you doin’?” I say, all smooth-like. She smirks—boom, I’m hooked! But then—get this—she’s quotin’ prices like a freakin’ menu. Fifty bucks for a “tour of the original,” she says. Straight outta the movie, man—“the original’s just a copy!” I’m dyin’ laughin’—she didn’t get it.

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So pack your bags, mate – explore every cranny of Kroonstad (za)! And remember, sometimes you gotta let life just flow, like in that grim movie, Fish Tank, where the world is raw and real. Enjoy the adventure, idiot, and keep your mind open, for the city’s got secrets that’ll blow your mind.

Diesel tanker looted for fuel in Kroonstad after overturning