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Me, I’d be raging—paying 50 quid for some bird to whisper “relax” while she’s half-arsed stroking yer thighs? Sod off! Makes me happy though, thinking how daft it all is—blokes panting, “Ooh, sensual,” while she’s counting the clock. Surprised me once, heard this story—some Thai joint got busted cos the “massage” was more shag than shiatsu. Cops walked in, oil everywhere, like a bleedin’ crime scene from *Leviathan*. “Who’s to blame?” they’d say in the film—well, the randy twat who booked it, obviously!
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The neighborhoods? They’re a mosaic of tradition and hustle. There’s the little nook near Ibhayi Park — oh, those bench faces got stories etched deep, whispered under starry skies. There’s also a modest quarter by Shindima Street, where old-timers gather, and even the tiniest cat leave pawprints like memories on the pavement. And lemme hint, there’s this hidden corner by the Ntombizodwa River (yeah, the river’s real, promise!) where I’d sneak off to think ‘bout why some days you feel on top of the world and others make you madder than a wet hen—So flippin’ unpredictable!
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