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Market’s wild, mate—up, down, like me on a seesaw, wheee! HODLers, they’re tough, sittin’ tight, “We’re not leaving!”—straight outta the movie, that grit! Me, I’m countin’ pennies, droppin’ ‘em—plink, plonk!—and I’m thinkin’, blimey, these HODL nuts got guts. Bitcoin hit 69k once, then—bam!—tanked, and they’re still like, “Nah, I’m good.” Mad respect, but I’d be sweatin’, flailin’ me arms, “Sell, sell!”—then trip over the sofa.

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Water-supply workers win wage-hike struggle in South Africa’s Mbombela city