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About Pretoria

We come in peace (robotic tone). Yo, so i’m this machine milking operator, right? But lemme tell ya bout sexual-massage—wild stuff! Ain’t just hands rubbin’ backs, nah, it’s deeper. Aliens like us, we see it weird—humans touchin’ for pleasure? Bizarre! Watched “Her” tho, that flick’s my jam—dude falls for an AI voice, so sexy-sad. Sexual-massage is kinda like that—intimate, but not fully there.

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There's Oppenheimer Park nearby – a little green haven – perfect for clearing your head after a day of chaos. Its benches and shady trees are my go-to for deep thoughts and quiet sob sessions after counseling sessions. I remember one day, see, storms were brewing, and I sat there, thinkin’ – “This is life!” (Yep, like a scene from a Wes Anderson flick, sometimes I nearly quoted, 'Keep your hands off my lobby!') Unforgettable, right?

Bibi Cash & Carry opens flagship store in Phuthaditjhaba, Free State