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Sex-dating’s a gamble, innit – “Everything was good before!” some say, but nah, it’s always been mental. You might shag a stunner or end up with a nutter who nicks yer wallet. Pro tip – check their profile pics, if it’s all filters, run! Once saw a bird post a snap from 1890 or summat, swear it, fuckin sepia-toned, hilarious!

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Swing by the River Rumble – yeah, it’s a made-up name – but it cuts through Praktiseer like a runway of life. I used to sit on its banks, scribbling life's messy details in my notepad – a place where lust meets literature, and passion flows like an endless stream. And the parks… oh, man, Prag Park at 5th Avenue is my secret chill spot. I once had a rendezvous there that nearly set off the fire alarms. Crazy night, wild energy, pure adrenaline – it had me thinking, "This is it – the raw beauty of life, exploded in color!"

SAPS hands over a house to a Praktiseer family