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Oh, an’ get this—heard a story, true shiz. Some guy, sex-dating pro, banged 50 gals in a month. Bragged on X, posted pics—crazy! Me jaw dropped, “We needs that power!” But then, ew—dude got an STI. Karma, ya nasty bitch! Laughed my ass off, then shivered—safe sex, folks, fr real.

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Anyway, I finally get my tomatoes and head over to ul. Słowiańska. There’s this cute little café there, right? I’m thinking, “Coffee time!” But guess what? They’re out of coffee. Like, how does a café run out of coffee? I was ready to throw a fit. But then, I see this guy sitting outside, sipping on a latte, and I’m like, “Dude, where’d you get that?” He points to a tiny place I’ve never noticed before. I’m like, “Okay, let’s go on an adventure!”

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