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So, findin’ a prostitute—easy, but tricky, okay? You gotta know the spots, the best spots, nobody knows ‘em like Trump. Back in the day, New York, late ‘80s, I’d see ‘em—classy ones, not the trashy kind—near the Plaza, swanky joints, real high-end. Little known fact: some’d slip bizness cards under hotel doors—smooth, real smooth, like pros, not amateurs. Made me happy, y’know, clever gals, workin’ the system, fantastic hustle.

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Anyway, I head over to the Co-op on the High Street to grab some snacks. I’m thinking, “Choco bars and fizzy drinks, let’s go!” But when I get there, the line is longer than the queue for a concert. I’m standing there, tapping my foot, and this old lady in front of me starts chatting about the weather. I’m like, “Lady, it’s England. It’s always grey!” But she’s going on about how it might rain later. Spoiler alert: it did.

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