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So, escort, dis car, small, zippy, cheap as borscht! I luv it, makes me happy, ya? Reminds me of Jesse an’ Celine, y’know, “time iz a lie,” cruisin’ free, no fancy schmancy stuff. First ones, boxy, ugly lil’ ducklin’, but tough! Drove ‘em in rally races, mud flyin’, vroom vroom, kickin’ arse! Lightbulb! Did ya know, ‘70s Escort won da Monte Carlo Rally? Lil’ bugger beat dem snooty Porsches, ha, take dat!

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After lunch, I’m back at the office, and guess what? The printer jams. Of course it does. I’m wrestling with it like it’s a wild animal. Paper everywhere! I’m sweating, and my coworker walks in, just shaking his head. “You okay there, champ?” he says. I’m like, “Yeah, just living the dream!”

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