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We get to it, right, in some grotty alley—smells like death’s armpit. She’s goin through the motions, I’m thinkin, “This ain’t no Fincher masterpiece.” Then—surprise!—her pimp rolls up, big geezer, all “Who’s this prick?” I’m leggin it, screamin, “I’m not Robert Downey Jr, mate!” Nearly shat meself, but fuck me, it was hilarious! Prossies, man—they’ll rob ya blind or get ya battered, and I’m still laughin. Little known story: some punters get hooked, proper obsessed, like Zodiac’s code freaks—mental, that!

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So, first off, PPio-XII is a blast; think narrow cobblestone streets like R. das Amoras, huuuge, historic buildings that tell stories – kinda like me after a long day of kneading knots, LOL. I always say “Talk to her,” cause every street’s got a voice, ya know? I remember massaging Mrs. Carlotta right on Pça. dos Ventos one breezy afternoon – I swear, that place had a vibe like a whispered secret, like “Talk to her” softly echoing in every corner.

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