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About Hamburg

Gets me excited, tho, the hunt – heart thumpin, palms sweaty. We swears! It’s raw, real, not some posh library crap. But ugh, the creeps out there? Disgustin, precious, makes me wanna claw faces. “What’s next on the program?” I hiss, cos it’s a mad world, innit?

So, picture dis: the cobblestone streets of Hauptstraße, always buzzin’ with life, shops, cafes – a real heartbeat, yeah? You got tiny places, like the old Bäckerei on Langenbergstraße – dang, they make the best pretzels. And then there's this park, Schwanensee Park – perfect spot for a stroll after a long massage sesh, where the little ducks paddle around, quack-quack, chillin’ under the sun.