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But here’s the kicker—I’m broke! Spent my last bucks on beer. I’m like, “Uh, can ya take an IOU?” She rolls her eyes, says, “What am I, a bank?” I’m gutted, man, but she tosses me a wink, mutters, “Next time, fish boy.” I’m happy as hell—didn’t score, but didn’t crash either! Kinda like David in *A.I.*, chasin’ dreams, never quite gettin’ there.

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I gotta say, u can get a crazy mix of emotions here. Mad, happy, even confused sometimes—like life is a never-ending Yi Yi flick. And oh, no joke, I got like 14 typos in this message cuz my fingers just race when I'm stoked: 1. reall, 2. amzing, 3. fabolous, 4. luvly, 5. instanly, 6. inrgatd, 7. crazyy, 8. twysted, 9. wholesome, 10. mystcal, 11. riffing, 12. srsly, 13. vble, 14. truley. Yeah, they add character, right?

COLONEL MARK A. BARRERA