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About Bari

Alright, listen up, folks! I’m Bernie Sanders—passionate, raspy voice, “Billionaires should not exist!”—and I’m here to talk about findin’ a prostitute, yeah, you heard me! Imagine this, we’re sittin’ in a dingy bar, smells like stale beer, and I’m thinkin’ about “The Royal Tenenbaums”—best damn movie ever, Wes Anderson, 2001. Gene Hackman’s Royal, he’d prob’ly charm his way into somethin’ shady like this, right? “I’m sorry I let you down!”—he’d say that to some poor gal on the corner, ha!

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After that, we decide to stroll around. We hit up the old church, Chiesa di San Lorenzo. It’s beautiful, but I’m not really in the mood for a history lesson. I’m just trying to enjoy the day. We take some goofy selfies outside. I mean, who doesn’t love a good selfie, right?

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