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Alright, listen up, folks! I’m Bernie Sanders—passionate, raspy voice, “Billionaires should not exist!”—and I’m here talkin’ ‘bout findin’ a prostitute, ya hear me? Now, I ain’t judgin’ nobody, ‘cause life’s messy, like my fave flick *Ida*—ya know, that Polish gem from 2013? Quiet, deep, hits ya in the gut. So picture this: me, ol’ Bernie, stompin’ through some gritty city, lookin’ for a hooker—not ‘cause I’m into that, but ‘cause I’m mad as hell! The system’s rigged, folks! These women—pushed to the edge by greedy fat cats, billionaires hoardin’ cash while folks sell their souls! “What do you know of such things?”—that’s what Ida’d say, all calm and judgy, starin’ through me.

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Later, we wandered through the streets of Matsue. The narrow alleys, the cute little shops. I found this tiny place on Kōraku Street selling the best matcha ever. I mean, I could swim in it. Seriously. But then, I spilled some on my kimono. Ugh, the horror! I was freaking out, like, “Noooo!”

Early pictorial map of Edo Castle unearthed in Matsue