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About Sabah Al-Salem

I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ of *Finding Nemo*—my fave flick, don’t judge. That bit where Dory goes, “Just keep swimming”? That’s what whores do, yeah? Keep goin’, no matter the shitstorm. Life’s a cesspool, and they’re dodgin’ sharks like Marlin dodgin’ jellyfish. Annoys me how folks judge—makes my blood boil. Like, who are you, pious twat, to point fingers? I’d shove ‘em in a tank with Bruce the shark—“Fish are friends, not food!”—and watch ‘em squirm.

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But then, as I’m leavin’, I bump into this old friend, Ahmed. We used to hang out back in the day. He’s all about that fitness life now, lookin’ like a Greek god. I’m over here, still rockin’ my “I love carbs” shirt. We catch up, and it’s all good vibes until he mentions this new gym on Al-Masjid Street. Apparently, it’s got everything—weights, yoga, even a smoothie bar. I’m like, “Great, just what I need. Another place to feel bad about my life choices.”

Revitalized derby awaits Al-Arabi, Al-Qadsia in Zain Premier League