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About Nijmegen

So, findin’ a prostitute—where do ya even start? Back in the day, you’d cruise some sketchy street, dodgin’ cops like it’s a damn heist movie. Now? It’s all apps, cryptic posts on X, coded emojis—eggplant this, peach that. I’m like, what’s this, a fruit salad?! Drives me nuts! I’m scrollin’, thinkin’, “This is not a game, this is my life!”—straight outta Carlos, baby. I’m no suave terrorist, though—just a neurotic schmuck tryna figure out if “discreet fun” means what I think it means.

Erotheek Bowika

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I’m running around, trying to fix it. I’m no barista, but I’m giving it my best shot. I’m sweating like crazy. I’m thinking, “This is gonna be a disaster.” But then, this old lady, Mrs. van Dijk, bless her heart, comes up to me. She’s like, “Don’t worry, dear. Just breathe.” I’m like, “Thanks, Mrs. Dijk! You’re a lifesaver!”

Restoring natural streams in the city