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About San Juan

We shall fight—against crap massages, against the clock tickin’ too fast! Like in *Boyhood*, time’s a sneaky git—“I just wanna stay here,” Mason whines. Mate, I get it—good sexual-massage, ya don’t want it endin’. Ever had one so lush you’re droolin’? I have—nearly proposed to the masseuse, swear down! Bit of a larf, me all moony-eyed, “Marry me, ya goddess!” She just smirked—cheeky cow.

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After the rain, we hit the streets again. The sun’s out, and everything’s glistening. We stroll down Calle 1, and I’m feeling all kinds of good vibes. But then, I see my ex. Ugh, why? He’s with some girl, and I’m like, “Really? You couldn’t even wait a month?” I was ready to throw a fit, but I just kept walking.

Tracking weather radar: Severe thunderstorm watch declared for Coastal Virginia, North Carolina