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But then – surprise! She say, “100 dollar!” What?! In Kazakhstan, that buy me three wife! I so angry, I kick trash can, it fall, loud bang! “I think I killed someone,” I joke, like movie again, but she not laugh. She say, “Pay or go!” I think, “This prostitute tougher than me, big detective!” I give 50 dollar, she take, we go. Very nice, but I broke now, haha!

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Then I decided to check out the local art scene. There’s this gallery on Calle José de Diego that’s always buzzing. I walk in, and there’s this painting that just hits you, you know? It’s like the artist captured the essence of Dorado—the colors, the vibe, everything. I was feeling all artsy and deep, then I overheard some pretentious dude talking about “the existential crisis of modern art.” I rolled my eyes so hard, I thought they’d get stuck. Like, chill bro, it’s just paint on a canvas.

1 Killed, 3 Injured In El Dorado Hills Collision