Lily Fajardo Prostitute ❤️

About Caguas

Oi, ya mates, listen up! Me, Gru, ya know, Russian-ish vibe, “Lightbulb!”—gotta spill about prostitutes, yeah? So, Hawaii, sun’s blazin’, waves crashin’, and there’s this chick, right? Sells love for cash, classic gig. Saw her once, sashayin’ down Waikiki, heels clickin’, skirt so short it’s basically a napkin. Reminds me of *Far From Heaven*, ya know? That Todd Haynes flick I’m nuts about—where Cathy, bless her, says, “I’m not like that!” But this gal? She’s all in, no shame, livin’ loud.

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Anyway, I finally get my empanada. It’s hot, flaky, and just the right amount of greasy. I take a bite, and it’s like a flavor explosion in my mouth. I’m in heaven. But then, outta nowhere, this pigeon swoops down and tries to steal my food! I’m like, “Dude, back off!” I swear, that bird had some serious guts.

Als move Fajardo to six-game injured list; Ouellette out for Thurs.