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Here’s the deal tho – it’s risky, shady as hell. You gotta watch your back, like Ivan in *The Return* dodgin’ danger. “Where are we going?” he asks – same damn question I got cruisin’ these streets. One time, I saw a dude get rolled, wallet gone in 2 seconds flat – hilarious if it ain’t you, pathetic if it is. Pro tip: cash only, no cards, dummy.

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But then, I see this group of tourists from the mainland. They’re laughing, taking selfies by the beach, and I can’t help but smile. Luquillo’s got that vibe, ya know? The palm trees swaying, the sound of the ocean—it’s magic. I’m like, “Okay, maybe today won’t be so bad.”

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