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But – Zen pause – it’s risky, right? You’re dodgin’ creeps, cops, STDs – ugh, grosses me out. One time, heard this dude hagglin’ – “50 bucks, c’mon!” Made me laugh, then pissed me off. Cheap asshole. Reminded me of Ting-Ting in "Yi Yi," all innocent, caught in dumb drama. These girls – some got stories, man, heavy shit.

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Then, boom! Outta nowhere, it starts pouring. I mean, typical Scottish weather, am I right? I duck into a shop on the corner of Burrell Street. It’s a cute little place, full of knick-knacks and tartan stuff. I’m browsing, trying to find something to cheer me up, when I overhear this couple arguing. Like, full-on shouting. I’m standing there, pretending to look at a stuffed Highland cow, but I’m totally eavesdropping. They’re fighting over who forgot the milk. I’m like, “Get a grip, it’s just milk!”

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