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Oi, mate, lemme tell ya bout whores—bloody fascinatin’, right? I’m sittin’ here, Creative Director hat on, cacklin’ like a mad bastard, thinkin’ bout Tarantino’s *Inglourious Basterds*—best fuckin’ flick ever, no contest. Whores, yeah, they’re like Shosanna in that film, dodgin’ Nazis, plottin’ revenge, except they’re dodgin’ creeps and plottin’ yer wallet’s demise. “This is the face of revenge!”—ha, more like the face of a fiver slipped in a garter!

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Ahh, where to start? The rivers – we got a split little river running through the southwest, Mystery Creek (yeah, we named it ‘cause it sometimes vanishes in a cloud of fog, I kid you not) that flows past the park. The park, the little gem down at Maplewood Park, is bustling with families, folks walkin’ their dogs, always a kid runnin’ around. I remember when I first visited with my friend – man, chaos, humming nature, and a feeling that everything’s gonna be OK, sorta in that crazy, edgy way that movie shows.

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