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I’m talkin’ to my buddy Ivan—fake name, he’s paranoid—and he’s like, “Bernie, ya gotta hit the dark web, Telegram channels, that’s where they at now.” I’m pissed, man! Why’s it gotta be so damn complicated? Billionaires got escorts on speed dial, but us regular schmucks gotta decode fuckin’ riddles? “Hang me, oh hang me,” I’m singin’ in my head, feelin’ like Llewyn, lost as shit. I dig the hustle though—makes me happy seein’ folks outsmart the system. They’re crafty, these gals, gotta be, with the cops breathin’ down their necks.

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Man, I been here a while, watchin' families, listenin' to their stories. As a family psych guy, my ears pick up even the tiniest sighs like a radar. There's this park—De Kraal Park, yep—that has goofy swings and benches where old folk spill their life’s secrets. I was once in a wild discussion with a mom about the universe and said, "This is zero dark thirty in our soul, right?" And she just cracked up. "You bet," she mused. Cosmic truth, man!

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